'Leap And The Net Will Appear...'
The sun is setting in spectacular fashion tonight, red and dark blue grey dropping down behind the palm trees, behind the sea…
Ten minutes later – it is the dark.
The motorbikes and mopeds are starting up and people are leaving the beach, heading back to wherever they came from this morning, to their homes and their hotels,
This afternoon we went to the pool to find Flo and Yiing who are leaving early in the morning for their honeymoon destination…
A few of the other wedding guests were gathered there too, it felt rather as if we were in the next scene of this film, (of our lives)
…meeting up with fellow wedding guests over a period of a few days in different contexts and in different clothes; not many on by the pool as you might imagine…
‘Where are you going next…’? Maaike, Flo’s sister asked us…
We told her that we were going to go to three different islands over the next five weeks, and that Amy my PA knows our future movements better than we do..!
Fortunately she has printed us out an amazing itinerary…
So, as my Dad used to say “if all else fails, we can read the instructions…!’
‘Will you be holidaying or will you be working?’ Maaike asked
‘We are always working’ – we said; ‘But we’re always on holiday too…’
It feels like I have been on holiday all my life…
From the very beginning of my working life, which was in 1977! - I have had this way of being as an orientation…
This in part I suspect, is due to never staying in anything that has felt intrinsically ‘wrong’ for me;
And staying with everything that feels right; even if it has presented challenges;
Whatever my soul has cried out for; I have followed…
Sometimes I’ve stayed with something when it has looked strange to do so, to some…
Other times I have left something that has looked to be good from another’s perspective….
This has meant that my life has often in the past felt hazardous and looked very precarious, particularly when I have leapt without an obvious next step…
But I have always found John Burroughs quote to be true
‘Leap and the net will appear’
The biggest guiding force for me has been my creativity in the form of my running; when my lifestyle has compromised the space and time to run… I have changed my life!
In the 90’s I was working in the corporate world, my work was growing, I was travelling a lot, and being paid a lot…
But – it was compromising my running and my health…
My running had slipped away to a ‘fitting it in when I could’ space…
I would always request a hotel with a gym, or nearby fields if possible, so that I could run…
But I knew I was on a slippery slope when at the end of a day of work in a company in Cardiff, my two colleagues were going out for a drink…
‘You want to go back to the hotel before dinner to run don’t you Julia?’
‘No I don’t…’ I replied, ‘I want to come and drink champagne with you’!
…It wasn’t long after that, when I was away in Philadelphia that soul shouted loudly… I was exhausted; I always enjoyed the work with people… but trying to run after two hours sleep because of delayed planes and then work all day, wasn’t that conducive to good running form!
I was talking to a friend on the phone and saying how exhausted I was, but that I was good at helping people with their journeys…
‘But what about your journey Ju,‘ he said…
And that was it…
I came home and unraveled from all my work and committed there and then to exploring my running more deeply again. That action opened my life in so many unexpected ways….
Just like now…
I am following where my running is calling me to go…
When Anadi and I first spoke together about becoming nomads; I wondered what this meant for my work…
When I want to access my deeper knowing, I simply write a question down and then write the answer without thinking at all, just allowing the answers to channel through…
The answer came loud and clear.
There are more miles to be run, in following the running path, you are following your creative expression and the answers are in each step of the way…
In loving yourself enough to follow your passion; you are open to surrendering to loving your husband Anadi with no block, no barriers, no hope that he will fulfill in you that which he cannot.
Only you can fulfill your love, your joy, your steps towards freedom through free exression...
From this commitment it is possible to deepen in love with another, with all others...
And so I am following my own inner guidance; even though at the moment I cannot run far or fast. It is the energy of my creative expression that I am following...
Trusting myself.
Trusting each step.
Trusting that loving myself enough to do what I desire opens me to deeper capacity to love and be loved….
Soon we are off for dinner, to have more lessons in speaking Thai from Laan…!
But first I am going to do some stretching and strength training in the gym to compliment the 65 minutes of cardio completed there this morning…
Like all my strength and conditioning sessions… it won’t take long :)